Friday, October 13, 2006 @ 11:37 PM
let the negativity flow out of your system
ok so an hour ago i made this entry that contained curses as abundant as the population of the Philippine Islands. weh. ok, so im exagerating.. i was wailing here and there like a 6 year old who wanted her mommy to buy her the latest doll at the mall display window. for goodness' sake hija, 20 ka na. turning 21. act your age! ok my ranting is about my job. i have been praying for it since i lost my DQ job due to medical reasons. after the long wait, get something that i like---retail job. i love clothes. i love to shop. perfect for me. but i made a mistake somewhere along the interview. when asked how much i expect to be paid, i said minimum wage. ok, laugh all you want. but i was not ready for that question. i swear i had practiced my answers to every single question that might be asked. but not that. for some reason i did not expect that question. so i was shocked and was not able to think correctly. i blurted the amount i honestly consider low. but still, i was grateful that i finally have a job. but for the past days i feel so stupid cause of that talaga.. compared to other people workin in retail stores---or even fastfood, i am really getting a sucky one. secondly, i was whining cause i have to BUY complete outfits. take note, shoes are included. literally from head to toe. and we all know that this company is a pricey brand. i swear. so i was stressed thinking that i haven't even started work yet, i will be in debt. we're not just talking bout a hundred bucks. i don't have money to purchase their stuff yet ok? i don't think we'll get free stuff. discounts maybe. but with the price that they ask for, a 50% discount(ok so i don't think my employee discount is this big) would not be enough.. hay. and my whining all day resulted to a bigger problem. i wasn't able to do anything school related today thinking about these effing-not-so-important-as-school stuff. to think i have 3 midterms and 4 assignments due next week----same week im starting work.
i was getting pretty upset so i woke mum up. i needed a pep talk. well, not really. she was sorta shouting.. she made me realize that i have not even started yet and im already complaining. to hell with the dollar/dollar-fifty more that other people are getting! God gave me this blessing, i should be thankful. she asked me if given the chance, will i choose mcdonalds rather than this one? of course i would choose this any day! (cause of my back problem nga) i like retail and i think this is an easier job. to my manager, im sensing that she is a good person. if i am the only one geting this sucky rate, i hope it gets to her that i deserve whatever rate my co-workers are getting(see, we cannot ask each other about that). thanks mum for the talk. i needed it, really. i was fuming before talkin to her. sorry for stressing you out too.
im sleeping now cause i am waking up at 5am to study. yep, you heard it right. im waking up at 5 am on a saturday morning to study! i cannot start now. it's late and my game plan for today is busted cause i stressed myself over nothing so ill start early tom. i better pray. i have to apologize and say grace. study study study. plus sideline of shopping for work clothes.